Each week, we’re recapping the latest Bachelor episode featuring Seinne Fleming, former Newport Beach resident and current Season 22 contestant vying for Arie Luyendyk Jr.’s love. Welcome to #SeinneScenes, everyone …
I’m convinced the most recent episode of The Bachelor existed in a parallel universe, where good is bad and bad is really, really bad. How else can you explain one of the most honest, outspoken contestants going home; a girl with an irrational fear of Pomeranians forced to scoop dog poop and literally zero scenes with Seinne?
The show began on Monday with a group date that involved some kind of fake fighting contest. Seinne wasn’t picked for the date so honestly, I swirled my Pinot Noir during most of this part and sprinkled chives on my avocado deviled eggs. (Bachelor-Watching Party Tip 101: Have lots of wine on hand and cute, snack-able snacks. Plus 10 points if these snacks involve an avocado.)
As the girls gather to hear who’s attending the one-on-one date, the camera pans to a girl hugging Seinne. She smiles, squeezes back. You know you’re a star on this show when even your competition adores you.
Lauren Schleyer is picked for the date, who as per Seinne’s Insta story, happened to be watching with our Newport Beach girl as the date aired.
“She’s laughing not crying,” said Seinne on Instagram as we see Lauren’s candid reaction to a Napa Valley rendezvous with Bachelor Arie gone awry. (She was sent home after lamenting to the camera, “I don’t know why I can’t be myself. I just can’t be myself around him!”)
As a really important aside, Seinne’s own Bachelor-watching party looked amazing. She was with a few of the cast members on some oversized, comfortable-looking bed, drinking wine and taking in the romantic pitfalls of their own televised relationships. #BachelorNationGoals.
The second group date again doesn’t involve Seinne (uh, what?) but does involve a dog show at The Grove put on by the contestants. There’s also Chris Harrison sitting at a picnic table with comedian Fred Willard, both providing colorful commentary like, “Oh good heavens” while wearing bowties and supercilious smirks.
During this group date there’s another one of those weird, slow-motion flashbacks except this time it’s prompted by one of the girls sharing she had a traumatic childhood run-in with an angry Pomeranian and now cannot be around dogs of any kind. Or something.
One of dogs relieves himself (No. 2 if you’re curious) and the girl in charge of this dog (I don’t know her name because she’s not Seinne) says to the camera, “It’s not about the role you’re given, it’s about what Arie will see in you.”
I guess after that she discarded the poo. Timeline is fuzzy.
Ok, at this point it’s 9:28 and STILL NO SEINNE! WHAT THE WHAT?!? Finally, the rose ceremony is upon us and Arie appears at the Bachelor Mansion and immediately says, “Sienne, do you want to come with me?”
They walk off holding hands, giggling (as they should).
OK, here we go! Right? Wrong. When Arie appears onscreen next he’s not with Sienne and instead with Lauren B., hanging on the very couch Bibiana set up for them as a romantic rendezvous—rose petals and soft lighting included.
“You’re joking,” says Seinne, in one of her only on-camera moments, and comforts Bibiana like any dependable friend would after said friend’s night-couch date was sequestered by one of the bevy of women on this show named Lauren.
What ensues next gets us back to that whole parallel universe thing. Bibiana doesn’t get her movie-perfect moment with Arie, Tia drinks moonshine, which Arie says tastes like gasoline but in the best way, and Annaliese gets rejected by him when she asks for a kiss. She returns to Arie after a solid bathroom cry, seeking clarity about the would-be kiss that never was, and in that cringe-worthy moment all girls can relate to, he tells her it just isn’t ever going to happen and sends her home. (Raise your wine glass if you’ve ever put yourself out there with a guy only to be oh-so-bluntly rejected for your commendable romantic pluck.)
In the final few minutes, Seinne gets a rose, Bibiana doesn’t and all seems askew in the Bachelor household.
“I deserve real love but I lost my chance,” Bibiana says as she exits the house, tears glistening her eyes, spirit crushed.
Oh I hope not, Bibi. I hope not.
BTW, Seinne’s reaction to this post is exactly why we love her:
v v true, if you blinked you wouldn’t have seen me on the show this week. I played the role of moral support to my girls which is just as important. Thanks for the love anyway! 😘 https://t.co/DdaQzAp3LP
— Seinne Fleming (@seinnefleming) January 17, 2018